Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
