Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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