every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
Randomize
