Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
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