I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
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