He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
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