i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
Randomize
