i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
I would like to be the first to explain to you that if you've woken up with bruised knuckles this morning, it's because last night you tried climbing out of our car window and into the drive through window at maccas. The cashier chick freaked out and slammed the window on you and beat you around the head with her headset thingy.
Shittttttt.
Be not ashamed. It was youtube-worthy.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
Randomize
