well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize
