Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
Randomize
