yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Randomize
