i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
i need some magic done to my vagina
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize