Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
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