Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
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