So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
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