To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Note to self. Never fart in a tanning bed
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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