He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize