she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
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