eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
