Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
Randomize
