I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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