He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
Randomize
