What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
Randomize
