So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
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