Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
last night I used snow as a chaser
Randomize
