She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Randomize
