So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
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