Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
Randomize
