i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
