Your tits are I can't wait for
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Randomize
