It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
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