Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Randomize
