He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
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