you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
Randomize
