...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
