so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
it was like his penis was on wheels.
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
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