I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize