Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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