I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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