let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
Randomize