I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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