I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
Randomize