I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
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