oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
