Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
Randomize
