tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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