I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
Randomize