you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
Randomize