kristin has been a bad kristin
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
Randomize
