Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
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