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• (703): View more from Virginia

  Grow some girl-balls and come out already

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.

  (720): View more from Colorado

  Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.

  (303): View more from Colorado

  But what if I pay for the gas?

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• (513): View more from Ohio

  Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home

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• (713): View more from Texas

  I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.

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• (515): View more from Iowa

  This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.

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• (406): View more from Montana

  well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded

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• (617): View more from Massachusetts

  FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day

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• (615): View more from Tennessee

  There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.

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• (630): View more from Illinois

  I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.

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• (804): View more from Virginia

  Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"

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• (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants

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• (714): View more from California

  I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.

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• (617): View more from Massachusetts

  At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.

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• (602): View more from Arizona

  I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...

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• (262): View more from Wisconsin

  I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...

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