we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
You may now shotgun with the bride
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
Randomize
